Shiny things

Shiny Things...What are they and how long do you hold on to them?

Are you that shiny thing? That bright and new shiny thing that someone picks up plays with and then finds something new to play with leaving you in the back corner or on the dirty old shelf till they are ready to even look at you again...

Or ....

Are you that person that picks the shiny thing up to play with, then gets tired of it and throws it away...

Yeah well shiny things are people too, you know, with feelings that will and can leap off the shelf never to be seen again. Only to peek back in every once in a while to say hi or to get put back on the shelf.

MMMM i wonder which i am? Do i pick up the shiny thing or am i the shiny thing ... IN my opinion i am both.. yes that is right i do both... but more over we all do it.. Oh come on don't tell me you have never gotten tired of someone or something and slowly backed away from them because they didn't "excite" you anymore or the person that gets replaced but something more exciting...

Now Come on and look at your life. Are you tired of being the shiny thing or picking it up? Take a step back and look... I mean really look! Is it the same thing over and over again. Do you continuously do it again and again?

Wait... is this a cycle? Is there something we need to learn?
Why is it the shiny thing that gets broken every time someone picks it up.

Now wait...

In a physiological point of view one would say that I am broken or not wanting to play the social game of life Or MAYBE when I do open my heart up thinking that person wont hurt me ... I open up all the way. Sure that must be it.. BUT I DON'T OPEN MY HEART .... My heart has been closed to the outside world for MANY years or should say a few decades. It takes A LOT for me to open up to someone. Yeah sure i will gladly tell you about the factual events of my life or be blunt about things... BUT I don't SHARE my true feelings with just ANYONE. Do you think that you can just say hi to me and i will cry on your shoulder... NO! Yes i get pissed about things but you may never know the REAL reason WHY I am pissed. Oh Hell some days i don't even know that one! Does that means that i am like every other typical female out there.. I am like a delicate rose with many layers to go through to get to my core. Yeah yeah.. I said Delicate.. whatever FUCK OFF!

So how in the world can this be. I have always put my defenses up to everyone and that does include my husband.. Hell poor guy it took him 6 years just to see the "core" of me. Before i Truly let him in. However their is a side of me that Protects me at all times. Yeah that's right fuckers.. it is the BITCH in me. The Raving bitch that will have NO problem Ripping you a new asshole or tell you exactly how i feel in some way or another. I believe i like that side of me but it has it's purposes.

I Do "express" myself in many ways but to show you the real me let you in that is a bird of a different feather. So DO count your self lucky if i do let you see that. However there is another side to that... and that it is simple if you DO see that side then i DO entrust you with it.. NOT to fucking hurt me.

Yeah this is me... love me or not

I am selfless but i am Selfish too...
I see what you see and more
I watch and listen to what is really there ...

I don't endure pain of the heart very well never have...
I just analytically laid myself out there for you to see why i do what i do... So did I just answer my own question for you?


Yeah, yeah I hear it now, YOU say, what questions?... RIGHT?!? Well fuckers that means you weren't READING what i said... so now i will tell you ... GO BACK AND READ IT AGAIN!!!!

My Point here being is that even all the shiny things in the world could possibly be a human being... it is the "newness" of something that gets you excited to the point where you get so attached that you end up hurting that person. If everyone was honest and open about things it WOULD make things SO much easier.

You know like this... Person: Hi my name is _____ and you are my shiny thing! Do you mind? Shiny thing: Hi _____ sure i don't mind being your temporary ego boost in your life to help lift you up and use me up then discard me like i was never there!! I would love to....

Now come on doesn't that sound like fun!

Now there is another side to this as well ,of course there is.. Everything has another side. Um hello ... if there wasn't another side to things life would be boring, now wouldn't it! There are many people out there that don't understand that they are doing this. Picking up the shiny thing , toying with them then discarding them out the window. Now the person that picked up the shiny thing, the Picker, has a new and shiny toy as well as a refreshed ego! Wow... yes that is right folks the picker feels all good and shiny and wow new inside all because of the shiny toy.

But...

Then you have the shiny thing, the pickee, the person that admires the picker and boost their ego as well..but in the mean time you crave the part where the picker puts you down and leaves you be. Why? Because you WANT to keep yourself DOWN!

However the intriguing commonality of both is that the low-self esteem or moments of wanting enables us to continue to allow this cycle to continue.. OH come on even i get depressed!!!!

How can we stop the vicious cycle of continuing to try to boost their ego or to continue to keep yourself down... Simple ... Watch, Look and listen! Yes that is right... Watch and look at your life then listen to what is really going on in your life!

Now IF you say OH i don't do that... let me just say ONE thing.... BULLSHIT! Look again you do, do it. Everyone does.. NO one is excluded from it.. at one point in our lives we are one or the other or both!

However, you can look and realize what you are and stop the cycle before on both ends...

Remember Shiny things are people too!